Old Men in the Pub – Some quotes

Some time ago, I was in the BoB pub in Reading with some friends. At the next table was a pair of old men. Nice, homely looking gents just passing the time with a pint. They began to chat quite loudly, and we couldn’t help but overhear them. As they became more and more merry, the chat became more and more serious.

It might have been wrong, but we took some notes. Why? Because what they were saying made *no* sense. Here, for your delectation, are the quotes.

Barbed wire is a sign…don’t go near!

But there’s no sign…don’t go over!

All they’d find is my goolies.

—-

man1: My idea of Egypt is somewhere wet and cold.

man2: Tell me a famous Egyptian woman.

man1: Cleopatra.

man2: Cleopatras a bitch.

—-

Sand, finer than talcum powder .

There are two things I haven’t done with a camel…and I don’t want to .


They graze goats in the trees. Them trees have a special name.

Tree climbing goats?

—-

What I got is outside furniture. I got a bed and a bedside cabinet.

What do you make of that? You couldn’t make it up!

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